A Crabby Bitch

"Cancer is a mysterious sign, the one most filled with contradictions. Ruled by the moon, Cancerian moods fluctuate like the tides. They want security and comfort, yet seek new adventures. They are very helpful to others yet sometimes can be cranky and indifferent. They are both highly insecure and arrogantly confident that they are right. They will stand up for what they believe in but conflict of any kind causes them great distress.

Cancerians have a driving, forceful personality that is often hidden beneath a calm, cool exterior. They are very strong people who, more than any other sign, make their moves in life based on their emotions. Highly sensitive, emotional, kind and caring, these traits are hidden behind the crab's shell of indifference and aloofness, which will only get harder the more you try to penetrate it.

Moonchildren have a strong capacity for love and kindness and are guided by their intuitive ability. They have excellent memories, are very observant, and can read people amazingly well. They have to overcome their shyness and insecurity but once they do, their strong intuition, sensitivity, powers of observation, and intelligence will ensure great success."

"Cancers usually dress according to their mood, so their style is forever changing, and can be completely different from one day to the next. Charmingly deceptive, this sign likes to wear luxurious lingerie beneath indifferent outerwear. Style matters less than that their clothing feels soft and comfortable. Sensitive Cancers wear clothes that are feminine and pretty - and very huggable."


So, apparently, there's a reason I'm confused…
Not to mention, erratically dressed.