Dear Jz,
It's not that we don't love you.
You treat us well, after all.
You've resisted hole-punching us.
You take us for regular checkups.
You buy pretty things for us to wear.
You've learned how to choose men who know how to show us a good time…
But we'd like to go on record with a request.
The next time you hear a sadistic, tit-torturing, iron-gripped Dominant utter the words, "I forgot my nicotine patch this morning and am VERY frustrated right now"…?
PLEASE… we beg of you…
do NOT allow the words, "So, five minutes?" to fall from your lips.
Instead, we ask that you practice the following phrases:
"Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that!"
"How very irksome!"
"Golly, you'd better run straight home and slap one on ASAP!"
Should these prove too inconvenient, selective deafness might also be cultivated as an acceptable alternative.
Thank you for your prompt attention to this matter.
Sincerely,
The Girls
P.S. CVS has arnica on sale.
Just sayin'…
11 comments:
Cosigned by other sensitive naughty bits
sfp
I don't know why this never occurred to me before - they should make bras that can be lined with those frozen, cold-pack, gel thingies...
Oooooh wow!
Loved the hole-punch comment!
Hugs,
mouse
ROFLMAO!!!
Yes, that 'smart brain (mouth)' of yours is always betraying you ;p
I love the girls...I'll make them feel better.
Hugs & kisses,
...that's for the girls not you
-H
P.S. word verification TOUPE :-/
@greengirl: oooh that's a brilliant idea. We'll make a fortune. Yes, I said we, I'm gonna be your manager/adviser :D
-H
sfp-
Oh, naturally!
Altho' the bits did suffer somewhat less that particular day...
gg-
Dagnabbit, but you are a Thinking Woman!!
I knew you'd get ice in somehow but this?
This is genius...
m-
painfully apt, is it?
;-)
H-
I am shaking my head.
You are such a perv.
But that's is one of the reasons I love you, so I'll be gentle as I push your hand away... ;-p
However, don't go counting your profits from gg's idea!
Her intellectual property...
My blog...
doesn't leave much of a percentage left for you...
Oh dear... guess I can imagine how that went over... or maybe I don't want to!
*hugs*
turiya
Hahaha! Love it!
t-
let's just say he wasn't kidding...
b-
yes, well, this seemed mild after your flaming Hitachi story...
:-)
Perv...me? You say the sweetest things *bats eyelashes*
gg's idea: darn! It was worth a try.
-H
If I have you batting your eyelashes, my work here is done...!
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