My voice always husks up when I have a cold, as I do now.
And when I'm in this condition, it's not uncommon for me to receive a comment, as I did today, that I should really consider work in the phone sex field, cuz my voice is HAWT! (Personally, I think I sound like Johnny Cash, but whatever.)
The point is that the comment highlighted something I've been considering this week, about all the different sensual components that go into finding someone attractive, and how the input of a single sense can convey so much disparate information.
Not to mention how individually we all prioritize our senses...
I've long known that I'm not particularly visual but it took a while before I realized just how driven I am by sound.
It shouldn't have come as a surprise… I dislike most sports because I find the clamor of the masses to be unpleasantly discordant. I can only stay in big art museums for so long before I am wincing with headache brought on by the nearly imperceptible whine of lighting and electronics bouncing off of marble.
But those sounds frame my reactions to things, not people.
The other day, however, I was listening to a podcast that was a round table of dominants and I realized that, despite liking most of what was said, I absolutely could not see myself submitting to any of these people. I wasn't sure why initially, so I sat down and picked it apart -- and realized the problem was what I heard about them in their voices.
It wasn't just the speech acoustics, altho' modulation of tone was certainly lacking for the most part. But I also kept tripping over elocution, articulation, and for the love of god, people, grammar. (OK, that last one falls more under the purview of "Jz as Persnickety Bitch" … but still, the fact remains. One more "where's that at?" and I just may issue The Scream That Is Heard Around the World…)
Now, before you quibble, No. None of those details have any bearing whatsoever on whether someone is a good person or not, a good dominant or not.
In general.
But -- attention to these details DOES say something about the values of the person presenting them -- and those values are indicative of traits that I personally find attractive. It's an extension of individual taste, like heavy or thin for the visual, stinky or fragrant for those driven by their noses -- it's simply what I like.
So in specific, to me, how you speak is a good predictor of how well we'll mesh.
(Seriously… can you imagine how black and blue I'd be if I was with a dominant who only spoke in sentences I felt compelled to correct?!?)
Reason #892 I am thankful for my deep-voiced, non-mumbling, complete-sentenced, grammatically-correct, magic-handed (but that's another post) Dom.
I can just relax and enjoy his hawt without any distractions. :-)
10 comments:
I'm kind of with you grammar-wise, although i actually tolerate a lot, having learned to speak incorrectly myself in order to survive in a world of non-grammarian snobbery, if you know what I mean. Vocabulary is my bugaboo. Don't misuse some big word when two simple ones would have worked.
:-)
sofia
Aural plays a big part in attraction for me. This evening, at a restaurant, a man with a voice pitch grating to my ears was seated behind me. His inflections were "off" as well. I could NEVER date him. Later I saw him. Physically he was ok but his 'tone' was unattractive.
Great post.
-H
I'm persnickety too; about grammar and usage.
I do correct Big Bad occasionally, if it comes up, and he doesn't beat me black and blue. I think he likes me to do it. And once or twice, he's even corrected me.
And I adore his voice. It's definitely part of the package that attracted me!
-sin
heehee... persnickety bitch, lol.
We are attracted to what we are attracted to, and I agree about the grammar (although, as you know, I play fast and loose with it myself).While an occasional lapse into a more common vernacular isn't a deal breaker for me, I need to know that the other person knows how to speak well. It's like Art. You have to be able to use a crayon, before you can color outside the lines.
s-
I didn't even dare touch on vocabulary because I really hoped to avoid a rant. But yes, use a word correctly or don't use it at all. (There, wasn't that restrained of me?)
I tolerate a lot, too. I cannot bring myself to speak incorrectly on purpose, but I also rarely correct others because, well, it's nice to have friends. :-)
And on a personal level, it's not such a big whoop. We all make gaffes, switch gears mid-sentence, and just generally miss the mark on occasion.
But when you're speaking in public - and casual format tho' a podcast might have, it's still public - you should really be paying more attention.
Yy
H-
Yeah, pitch can kill. :-)
I'm with you on that, sunshine.
(and thank you) ;-D
s-
yeah, a good voice can go a long way, can't it? :-)
lm-
"You have to be able to use a crayon, before you can color outside the lines."
^^LOVE THIS!^^
So absolutely spot on.
You nailed this one, chica.
There's been a few guys that mouse has heard speak and thought, "ya baby..."
Then she actually sees them...and wow. And the opposite has happened. One there was a super cute guy who worked with mouse...Oh he was gorgeous. Until he opened his mouth and his voice was high and squeaky...for a guy.
Hugs.
mouse
I appreciate good grammar. As a writer I'm also given to times when I throw it out the window to make a point (or a character's point)...but I'm not a perfectionist. Yet...I could not let myself feel safe and secure in the hands of a Dominant that said "ain't". It's my...line in the sand, I guess. :
I'm sorry you are not feeling well, and the voice thing...lol...yes, I've been in your shoes. Well actually, I don't think yours would fit...(grinning) since I'm short and round with matching feet. But you grok, yes?
*bump*
nilla
miz m-
you're absolutely right, it's all part of the mix … but it still matters, doesn't it?
(high and squeaky would be very difficult to consider hot, it's true)
n-
oh my heavens, you just made me shudder with that visual (audial?)…
(altho' there *is* a certain intriguing potential to a story entitled, The Dom Who Said "Ain't" ;-p)
So apparently, we share at least part of a line! ;-)
And I do grok.
In fullness, even.
*bump*
All of what you said matters a lot! Master is very attractive with a confident stride, but if his voice had clashed with that, or if he couldn't put a sentence together properly, it would have turned me off and we never would have gotten together.
t-
welcome!
yep... Many Things / All Important :-)
Post a Comment