I try to protest but it's hard when you don't have a leg to stand on.
I'm a klutz who is prone to spectacular accidents.
The best I can do is own it.
And maybe work it.
Or at least share the absurdity of it all.
SO-
I recently bought myself a pair of these:
Cute li'l hot pink plastic nipple suckers.
I have to admit, they're nifty gadgets. I've tried 'em a few times and me likey. They're simple but they work.
Luxuriating under the warm comforter on this snowy grey Saturday morning, I decided these would be just the thing to add that extra touch of sensation to the morning's solo entertainment.
It was a long, lazy, unhurried event, what can I say?
I noticed a time or two that the suction seemed to be easing, so I rectified the situation and returned to my previously-scheduled program. That last time really ratcheted the sensation up.
Oooo, that felt good ...
But all good things must come to an end.
Time to take these suckers off.
*pop!* ... *pop!*
"Holy Crap!!"
The second one fell away to reveal a giNORmous blood blister - the size of a pencil eraser, (nestled right up next to the other pencil eraser-like thing,) freshly broken and starting to drain.
Guess you're not supposed to utilize multiple re-suctions.
(Who knew?)
So now my litany of injuries also includes the one about The Time I Drew Blood With A Soft, Hot Pink Suction Cup.
*sigh*
Oh, well. At least BG liked the pictures ...
11 comments:
I am so happy that someone has taken the mantle of the Lucille Ball of BDSM from me
All Hail!
sfp
a useful public service announcement - one never knows.....
The Lucille Ball of BDSM.....ROFL....mindset, this whole post is priceless. We're all laughing because we can all see ourselves doing the same thing.
The sacrifices we make to satisfy our twisted minds, and our like-minded significant others...
sfp-
You could still be Ethel...
gg-
Maybe I should become, like, an officially designated test driver...?
KR-
Thank you for the kind spin on it.
A-
Ooo! That almost sounds noble and intentional. I'll take it!
Oh you poor poor dear.
That is freakin' hilarious!! I almost wanna do it myself. But, I won't.
I remember one day masturbating way too many times with a fabulous new vibrator I got. I gave myself a serious abrasion that hurt for days and days. :)
w-
Well, the suckers are actually pretty cool. Just don't get quite as enthusiastic as I did!
(and thank you for making me feel less alone...)
:-)
Did you explain to your nephew that helmets are No Good for the trouble auntie gets in?
ne, schat.
He'd blush.
And so would I...
Owie... seriously... owie... I'll definitely have to keep this in mind if we get some of those things.
*hugs*
turiya
PS word verification: penince
That is a VERY funny verification!
Well, I don't mean to scare anyone off getting these things, cuz I really do like them. This was just a combination of unusual circumstance and my innate absurd luck.
But, yes, if you DO ever get them, limit your "refreshes". ;-)
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