I Laughed Until I Cried

In a most timely stroke of serendipity (I have no time to compose anything at the moment -- VERY busy weekend here,) I just received permission to publish this.

So once again, A Post Cribbed From SP.  :-)

"The Statement" was nothing but a little email joke that I forwarded along to him.

I'd expected that he would just laugh and agree. 

(Silly, silly Jz...)

It was hours before I was done wiping tears of laughter from my eyes.

Hope you guys like it even half as much...

The Statement:

SP's Rebuttal: 

“Nice, but I don't know if I can accept the first statement as axioma.  If we go with axiomatic statements I could just as easily say that: girls=time+money

Now, if BOTH statements are correct, it would mean that time and money both are two which would makes girls and "all evil" four  --  assuming that the saying "money is the root of all evil", refers to a square root.  (Does this mean that "girls" need to be in groups of exactly or at least four to reach the level of "all evil"?)

However if the only true statement is:

     girls = money + time

we get:

     girls - sqrt(all evil) =time

or, of course:

     girls - time= sqrt(all evil)

The first conclusion seeming to indicate that life is bloody boring without girls who aren't at least a little naughty.

The second one seeming to indicate that not spending time with girls leads to discontented misbehavior, possibly even petty crime.

In this formulation it actually doesn't matter if it is a square or cubic or whatever root.

So, the "+" statement is preferable because it is more in sync with reality as can be observed and the issue of the root has been rendered unimportant. 

We learn from this, at least from my perspective: 

1) girls should be taught from early on that some evil is very good (if not even yummy)

2) guys need to spend time with girls

3) then there will be happiness and peace all over this world

There, once again I have resolved all problems and have created a simple and attractive path to world peace.

All I charge for this tremendous service is: one (1) eurocent per person presently living, and one (1) eurocent from every new-born until my death. I am not a greedy person."

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(I wanted to exercise my editorial prerogative and add in "And a Nobel Prize" between the last two sentences, to keep a certain continuity of theme going, but I was asked not to. He wasn't at all sure, "that such a simple equation is really Nobel worthy ... plus, [he'd] rather have the money.")